“It’s clear that my ex-partner’s husbands were not pleased with me divorcing their son.
I drove to my in-laws’ house shortly after the divorce and had a long, honest, challenging, awkward, wonderful, and complicated chat with them.
We made the decision not to point fingers, assign blame, or pass judgment. We just discussed the most crucial aspect of the situation: the children.
We made the decision to set our differences and pride aside and focus on what mattered most: family, forgiveness, and love.
I recall one particular phone call from early on when things between their kid and me were still very tight.
‘Well, if you’re not technically my daughter-in-law anymore, then you’re my daughter from now on,’ his mother responded.
Since then, they’ve treated me like one.
Another Thanksgiving will be spent at their home this week. I’ve always been made to feel welcome.
I imagined that once I started dating my present husband, the Thanksgiving invitations would stop. However, this is not the case. His invitation was also extended to him.
It’s been like a way for years, with all of us gathering for the holidays.
We ate as a family today for the first time in a long time. As he did every year, my husband assisted my ex-mother husband’s in setting the table and cleaning up.
I listened today as my ex-husband and current husband talked about work, football, and children.
My ex-husband and my son from my second marriage were playing superheroes today.
Today was about the things that really mattered, not the unneeded drama that we humans have a tendency to manufacture.
Divorce, remarriage, and co-parenting are all difficult situations. It’s the most difficult period of my life in several ways.
But it was all worth it because of our ‘kids first, egos last’ strategy. It was well worth it.
(The first photo is of my ex-mother husband’s and me during Thanksgiving last year.) My current husband is helping my ex-mother husband’s set the dessert table in the second photo, which was taken today.)”